Tuesday, June 12, 2012

The Good (I didn't say easy) Life

Look at these faces...

You want to give them everything don't you?  ..... New toys?  Sugar packets?  A car when they turn 16? 

The list goes on and on. 

My first instinct is to give them everything they could possibly want. But my (and Billy's) job in actuality is to give them what they need. 

Unconditional love and acceptance, guidance and the tools to function in this world.

I saw this quote on Pinterest and I wanted to frame it. 
This is one of the main guiding principles Billy and I have in our approach to parenting, but we had never really seen it put so succinctly.

Dear Max and Sullivan,

Just because we have the means to give you something doesn't mean you'll receive it on a silver platter.  These are our promises to you as you grow up....

1) You will help contribute to the things you want because we know from experience it feels much more gratifying to do so.  Helping to buy your own car will give you pride.   Participating in funding your education will give you appreciation.  But don't worry, we will always give you a strong foundation to build on.

2) The best things are born out of your own hard work. And as painful as it may be and as unfair as it will seem at times you will realize this is true one day.  Your father and I both had experience with this first hand.  Growing up, in our own separate worlds, we each worked multiple jobs, saved money for the things we wanted and missed out on some things that seemed important at that particular time in our lives.  We had wonderful parents and were given so much love and every opportunity anyone could ask for.  We look back and feel so lucky for the way our parent's raised us.
3) You will always have what you need.  We've been saving for your college for years already.  Truly, before your Dad and I were even married you had college plans set up under our names in anticipation of you in our lives.  Proof that I really do live up to the "crazy planner" title I've earned.  We also set a little aside for each of you every month with hopes of using it to help you buy a car, travel and perhaps study abroad one day.  These are things we want so much for you (and any future siblings), but we want you to play an active role in attaining these goals as well if they are paths you choose to pursue.

We think that following through with these promises will help you to lead a successful life.  To work hard and be thankful for all that you have.  Sometimes things will be challenging and frustrating.  Especially when others seem to have it much easier than you.  We want you to set your sights high and find pride in your accomplishments.  We hope you go after the things you want, whatever it may be, and never give up.   We believe in each of you so much.  And above all we just want you to be happy truly happy people.

All our love,
Mom & Dad

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